Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
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