none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
Randomize
