I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize