Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
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