i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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