Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Randomize