I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
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