Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Randomize
