The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
