I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Randomize
