Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
