so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
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