3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize