Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Randomize
