i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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