no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
