If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize
