All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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