He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
Randomize
