after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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