jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
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