Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize