I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Randomize
