Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Randomize