I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
this must be what syphilis tastes like
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
