I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
Randomize
