Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
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