She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
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