can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
Randomize
