playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Randomize
