Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
it's great music for shaving your balls
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
Randomize
