I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Randomize
