Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
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