I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
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