I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
