the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Randomize
