I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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