i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Randomize
