great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
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