Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Randomize
