I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
This is classic penis vs brain.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Randomize
