For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
Randomize
