if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
birth control should be required to get into college
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
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