I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
