Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
Im too awkward for one night stands. I need to hire someone to come clear them out of my bed before I wake up.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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