I hope mine doesn't look like that
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
You pole danced in your parka.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Randomize
