I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
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