i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
