why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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