Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Randomize
