i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
